She's home

Today I'm thankful for...
Everyday that I have to enjoy life
My back feeling better
Our little precious gift from God
Having the next two days with nothing planned

She's home!!!!

We have Lourdes in our home, the day we knew would come, is upon us at last. (and I don't think that Lourdes really cares much about what will be marked as a huge milestone in the Molina-Wilkerson's life's). As Lulu and I drove to the hospital, without much conversation, but a lot of nervous anticipation, I couldn't help but think that this day was going to rank as one of the most important in my(our) life's? I was thinking about how many truly joyous occasions I've experienced in my 43 years, and I knew that this day would trump the rest. (the others I dreamt about were; my wedding day, the day Carter was born, graduation from dental school, and my second date with Lulu; I didn't think that the first date was memorable?) When we arrived to St. Mary's for the last time, my emotions confused me. I had gotten used to the visits to the NICU here, and the team that cared for Lourdes felt like family. This has been the only home that Lourdes has known (for the first 83 days of her life), would she adjust to her new home? On the other hand this is the day that I was praying that would come sooner rather then later, and here it was staring me in the face. Today was to be a new, exciting chapter in our life's, and I was more scared then the day we brought our first child (Carter) home from the hospital.

When we arrived at the NICU room, it was apparent that Lulu was much more prepared than I for this day then I was. Lulu had a pink outfit (with pink, frilly shoes), a pink bow for her hair, camera for pictures, and a new car seat cover (yes it has pink in it). Lulu proceeded to change Lourdes into the "exiting the hospital" attire, and then we just had to parade Lourdes around the NICU for some heart felt goodbyes. As we got our pictures taken with many of the St. Mary's NICU team that had a hand in caring for Lourdes, at that moment, I didn't want to leave. These wonderful care givers had become a part of our lifes, and I could feel we were closing this chapter to start a new one and I didn't want to write the last words. It's hard to voice your feelings (and really words are insufficient to express the love I have for the caring persons) I did spew out some in-adequate words that sounded something like, "I want to express my thanks for your professionalism, and I can tell that you all love what you do, and it shows. Rarely, if at all, in the 83 days we were here did I see or hear negativity towards your jobs, patients, or their parents. That shows incredible professionalism and proves to me that you all love what you do." I could see that Lulu was just as caught up in the emotions as I, and our exit was very difficult. You all made a lasting difference in our lives that we won't soon forget. (I'm crying as I write this, that is how much this whole event has effected me).

We left holding our tiny, venerable girl, and Lulu and I gave each other much needed emotional support as we exited the hospital and drove the 14 miles home (I have done the drive so often, I know the exact mileage). The chapter that we had never wished to write in the first place; was officially done, and even under the circumstances we were glad that we had the chance to experience it all. We would have loved to have Lourdes born on her due date September 1st., and bypassed the last 83 days (that I can only describe as an emotional thunderstorm), but we have grown stronger from the experience. We eagerly await the first few days that we will have sole possession of the cute baby named Lourdes.